Avenging Wizard
by Marvelgeek42
Summary: Fury wakes the Avengers and some more people at 5AM. For what? Reading books. About who? Lord Harry James Potter-Black, but call him Harry.
1. The New Guy

**Hello!  
I saw that none of this exists yet,or that I couldn´t find anything, so I thought, I´d make one.**

**This ignores the end of Iron Man 3, all of Thor 2 I can´t remember and kinda the Epilouge of Deathly Hallows: I added a twin of Lily, called Collin Regulus and Harry doesn´t age, ´cause he´s Master of Death even if he never tried to. The day after the Battle of Hogwarts, when he woke up, the wand and the stone were next to him. Oh, and Loki turns good during the reading. This is somewher in 2014.**

**Jubel is Jubilation Lee or Jubilee of the X-Men, which I ship with Steve cause...banana.**

**The parings in this story are Tony/Pepper, Steve/Jubel, Bruce/Betty, Thor/Jane, Clint/Natasha, Darcy/Loki, Coulson/cellist, Harry/Ginny, Percy/Audrey, Ron/Hermonie, Bill/Fleur, Charlie/Lee, George/Angelina, Neville/Hannah, Katie/Oliver, Alicia/Dudley, Luna/Rolf, Draco/Astoria and...basically all cannon.**

**However, as this will not be very romantic, I hope nobody stopps reading because of a pairing...Oh, and don´t ask about Alicia and Dudley, it will be explained in...somewhere before Harry is off to Hogwarts. **

* * *

Tony´s PoV

The Avengers were in the assembling room of the helicarrier, waiting for Fury to come in and tell them what this meeting was about.

Seeing that it was only 5AM, all of them were grumbeling.

Especially Tony, who was already at his sixth coffee for this morning, as this was one of the few nights he planned on sleeping.

Thor was snooring loudly, what was probably the only thing that kept Bruce and Steve from doing the same.

Clint and Natasha were awake. Not happy, but awake.

Finally, Tony was now at his eight coffe, Fury came in.

He was accoponished by five women and two men. Tony was the only one who recodnized them all, well, most of them.

There were his Pepper, Bruce´s Betty, Thor´s Jane, Steve´s Jubel, Darcy Lewis aka the woman who teasered the god of thunder and lightning (Not reason and understanding :)), this _iditic_ Agent Hill (A _nuke_? In _Manhatten_? Nope, just nope) and unknown man and Agent.

Tony had directly known that Agent was alive. Why on earth would he take his beloved Captian America card in his suit?Made no sense at all.

Thogh the genius seemed to be the only one who figured this out, seeing as all the other Avengers, even Thor wo awoke at the opening door, yelled either: "Coulson!", "Phil!" or "Son of Coul!".

Back to the unknown man. He was about 17, average height, had black hair, emerald eyes and a lighting scar on his forhad.

Tony knew, thanks to Howard, a lot about scars, but he never saw a lightning shaped one.

Nickyboy had enough of the talking, as he shouted: "SILENCE!"

That shut the team up, except the billionare who asked: "So, my favourite pirate, would you be so kind to tell us, why you forced us to come here at this damn early hour?"

"To read these books."

"WHAT?!", yelled all of the Avengers, as their girlfriends, Darcy, Hill, Coulson and lighning boy all seemed to be knowing this already.

Said teen contined: "Yep, seven books about my life."

"I don´t mean to be rude", Featherboy interrupted, "but who the hell are you?"

"And why are you here?", added his science bro.

"Well, I am Lord Harry James Potter-Black, but call me Harry. As to why I am here...I did much more than you think. Also I´m not a teenager, I´m 34 and married", answered the...not-teen.

How was it possible for a 34-year-old man, to look not a day older than seventeen?

"As I was tring to say", continued Fury, while Tony was starting his ninth coffee, "Lord -"

"Harry."

"_Harry_ is the newest addition to the team. These books are his lifestory, as he refused to tell us."

Now Steve spoke for the first time, unless you count the reaction to Agent: "What brings you on the team, ... Harry? What can you do?"

"It will be in the books, and the are the only truthworthy about me. The other...two hundred are mostly rubbish. I dare to say none of you suspect this," commented Harry.

He was unusual? "Seems you fit in already. Why don´t we start, so that I can get some sleep?", I asked, taking the first of seven books Furylaid onn the table.

"This one is titled **Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone**, whatever that is. **Chapter One: The Boy Who Lived..."**

* * *

**Dislaimer: If Harry Potter or the Avengers, or the X-Men, belong to me, Napoleon Bonarparte fonded facebook.**

**Also, still my poll, this is just added and "Who said they were human?"still needs two more revies before I continue (hint, hint).**

**Please read and review! Pleeaase! *puppy-dog-eyes***

**~Marvelgeek42**


	2. The Boy Who Lived

**Hello, here I am.**

**Thanks for all the feedback, but Siriusly, check out my other stories "Who said they where human?" still needs two reviews.**

**I brought some people from the past back, so here´s from when they are:**

**Marauders, Lily, Regulus, Severus - Two Month before the OWL thing**

**Tonks - her fifth year**

**Fred and Collin - just before the BoH**

**I think that´s all**

* * *

"_This one is titled **Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone**, whatever that is. **Chapter One: The Boy Who Lived**..."_

* * *

**Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal,**

"Why would anyone want to be normal?", asked Darcy

**thank you very much.**

"You´re very welcome", chorused Clint and Tony. Their girlfriends just rolled their eyes.

**They were the last people you'd expect to be involved in anything strange or mysterious, **

"And that´s wrong", concluded Bruce

"Why do you think that?", asked Jane

"Well, Harry is obviously part in something strange or mysterious, otherwise he wouldn´t be here. This is a book about him, so they have something to do with him. Seeing they have another last name, I guess aunt and uncle. They just don´t sound like grandparents. Am I right, Harry?", explained Bruce  
"Yes. These people are, sadly, my family", confirmed Harry.

**because they just didn't hold with such nonsense.**

"I´m already sorry for you", said Tony

"Me too", added Clint

"Me three", Darcy joined in.

**Mr. Dursley was the director of a firm called Grunnings,**

"Grunnings?", asked Pepper, "I know that name. But why?"

**which made drills.**

"Ah, that´s why", answered Pepper herself, "They asked to help at Chicago Stark Tower"

"Decline later", Tony ordered

"Politely?", Pepper wanted to know

"Depending who runs it"

**He was a big, beefy man with hardly any neck, although he did have a very large mustache.**

"I would rather kill myself than see this man regularly", Darcy said, shuddering.

**Mrs. Dursley was thin and blonde and had nearly twice the usual amount of neck, which came in very useful as she spent so much of her time craning over garden fences, spying on the neighbors.**

"Shame she´s married", exclaimed Steve,much to surprise of everyone sans Jubel, who pouted.

"What? I have a sense of humor too! And Jubel, you now I love you"

**The Dursleys had a small son called Dudley**

Harry began to laugh histerically

"What?", asked Natasha

"The last word you would my cosin at that point of time is small", Harry answered grinning.

**and in their opinion there was no finer boy anywhere. The Dursleys had everything they wanted, but they also had a secret, and their greatest fear was that somebody would discover it.**

"Uhhhhh, blackmail", Tony said laughing

Thor looked confused and asked: "What is that "blackmail" you speak of?"

"It means when you have information about someone this person doesn´t want publish and you use that to your advantage", answered Loki out of the corner

Every Avenger, including Harry, Fury, Hill, Couldn't and Jubal jumped and Darcy grapped her teaser.

"Calm down, I do not plan to hurt anyone. I just wanted to introduce me to Harry and give him a pleasant surprise."

He went to Harry.

"Allow me to introduce myself: I am Loki of Asgard and Jortunheim. God of fire, mishief, chaos,lies and _magic_"

Harry gulped and the rest asked themselves why.

"What is the surprise?", Harry asked bravely.

"This"

There was a big light and suddenly a lot of people stood in the room. Most of us returned in fight position, but Harry looked lose to tears.

Bruce saw that first and asked: "You know these people, Harry?"

"Yes. Some of them are dead and I´m related to a lot of -"

"DADDY!", screamed a little redheaded girl and ran towards Harry.

"Hey, my girl. Do you know why you are here? Or you?", Harry added, looking towards the others.

"No, Daddy, Mommy was just getting breakfast for James, Teddy, Al Collin and me. I blined and than I was here."

"Okay, tiger,please go to your brothers and godbrother while I make sure Mommy isn´t worried, okay?", Harry asked and the girl nodded.

After she was next to four boys, two black haired, one red haired and the last turquoise, Harry continued with: "I´ll introduce everyone later, just be quiet for a minute, please"

He walked out of the room and appareted to the American Potter Manor.

"Ginny?", Harry screamed while walking in.

"HARRY! THE KIDS ARE GONE!"

"I know, that´s why I´m here. I told you of the appointment with S.H.I.E.L.D., didn´t I?"  
"Yes, but - "

"They have a helicarrier, what is about like a flying fortress. The god of Magic appeared and he brought the kids and some people of the past. Teddy´s parents, my parents, Collin, Sirius, Severus, Regulus and Fred"  
"WHAT!? HARRY JAMES POTTER YOU BETTER NOT BE LYING!"  
"I´m not, I swear on everything, Gins. I thought maybe you, George and some more would like to join in...?"

"YOU HAVE TO ASK?! You go back no and I´ll inform Bill, Fleur, Charlie, Lee, Percy, Audrey, George and all the others."

"See you later, hon"

"Bye, my savior."

Harry reappeared in the conference room and, surprisingly, everybody listened to him.

"Well, these are Regulus and Sirius Black, Collin Creevey, Fred Weasley, Severus Snape, Lily Evans and James Potter, my parents", everyone of the past gasped (Fred was because know he had met all the Marauders). Lily would say yes to James sometime?

"Teddy Remus Lupin, my godson, son of Remus Lupin and,I´m sorry, but I have to introduce you, Nymphodora Tonks, but don´t use her first name, my children"

CHILDREN?! He looked seventeen, the oldest looked nine!

"James Sirius, Albus Severus, Lily Luna and Collin Regulus Potter."

The past gasped again. A Potter named Severus? Or Regulus? Who was Luna? And -

"Remus, you know Luna is latin for moon", said James I

All those who had someone named after them said: "Thanks", though most were confused.

"Well, yeah. These are Thor Odinson, Nick Fury, Phil - "

"Agent", interrupeted Tony. The pranksters (James, Sirius, James Sirius, Remus, Loki, Clint, Darcy, Fred and Collin Regulus) laughed. Most of the others grinned.

"However, Phil Coulson,Tony Stark, Maria Hill, Steve Rogers"

Lily I gasped. She grew up as muggle in the sixties, of course she knew who Captain America was.

"Betty Ross, Jubel Lee, Loki of Asgard, Pepper Potts, Clint Barton, Natasha Romanoff, Bruce Banner, Jane Foster, Darcy Lewis, and I am Harry James Potter. We´re reading books about my life. The chapter at this moment is on November first, 1981. I invited more people, they´ll probably arrive in two chapters or so."

**They didn't think they could bear it if anyone found out about the Potters.**

"Who are we reading about? We Potter are awesome!", exclaimed James I.

"These people are you sister-in-law and her husband."

**Mrs. Potter was Mrs. Dursley's sister,**

"See?"

**but they hadn't met for several years; in fact, Mrs. Dursley pretended she didn't have a sister,**

"Gee, I love you too, Tunia."

**Because her sister and her good-for-nothing husband**

" IS NOT GOD-FOR-NOTHING!", exclaimed everybody who was part of the wizarding worl, except James I, Severus, Regulus and Lily. Although Regulus and Lily were not exactly sure, anymore

**were as unDursleyish as it was possible to be.**

"Oh, excuse them for not being ugly and boring. I didn´t knew that was a crime", said Clint. The pranksters, and more or less everybody else, laughed.

**The Dursleys shuddered to think what the neighbors would say if the Potters arrived in the street.**

"DAD, can we walk down their street?", begged James II

"Maybe"

**The Dursleys knew that the Potters had a small son, too, but they had never even seen him.**

"Those were the only good times before I was eleven"

What in Merlin left shoe happened?

**This boy was another good reason for keeping the Potters away; they didn't want Dudley mixing with a child like that.**

"And now, thirty-three years later he still has contact with Dad. What. A. Rebel.", said Collin.

"What is a rebel?", asked his twin sister.

"Someone like James and Uncle Dudley",answered the last born Potter.

**When Mr. and Mrs. Dursley woke up on the dull, grey Tuesday our story starts, there was nothing about the cloudy sky outside to suggest that strange and mysterious things would soon be happening all over the country. Mr. Dursley hummed as he picked out his most boring tie for work,**

"This man has issues. Most _boring _tie?", screamed Sirius

**And Mrs. Dursley gossiped away happily as she wrestled a screaming Dudley into his high chair. None of them noticed a large, tawny owl flutter past the window.**

"Are they blind?"

"Baby Dudley was screaming. That needs all attention possible.

**At half past eight, Mr. Dursley picked up his briefcase, pecked Mrs. Dursley on the cheek, and tried to kiss Dudley good-bye but missed, because Dudley was now having a tantrum and throwing his cereal at the walls.**

"It took him fifteen years to stop that."

"by the way Harry, what year is it? And why do you still look seventeen? And _?"

"2014, won´t answer now."

**Little tyke," chortled Mr. Dursley as he left the house.**

"He most definitely was not little", said Collin C.

**He got into his car and backed out of number four's drive. It was on the corner of the street that he noticed the first sign of something peculiar - a cat reading a map.**

"Why is a-"

"Ignore it."

**For a second, Mr. Dursley didn't realize what he had seen - then he jerked his head around to look again. There was a tabby cat standing on the corner of Privet Drive, but there wasn't a map in sight. What could he have been thinking of? It must have been a trick of the light.**

**Mr. Dursley blinked and stared at the cat. It stared back. As Mr. Dursley drove around the corner and up the road, he watched the cat in his mirror. It was now reading the sign that said Privet Drive - no, looking at the sign; cats couldn't read maps or signs.**

"Unless it´s Minnie", Sirius whispered to the other magical pranksters.

"One Galleon?", asked James  
"Your money"

**Mr. Dursley gave himself a little shake and put the cat out of his mind. As he drove toward town he thought of nothing except a large order of drills he was hoping to get that day. But on the edge of town, drills were driven out of his mind by something else. As he sat in the usual morning traffic jam, he couldn't help noticing that there seemed to be a lot of strangely dressed people about. People in cloaks. Mr. Dursley couldn't bear people who dressed in funny clothes - the getups you saw on young people! He supposed this was some stupid new fashion.**

"Actually it´s a cool, practical old fashion", corrected Teddy

**He drummed his fingers on the steering wheel and his eyes fell on a huddle of these weirdos standing quite close by. They were whispering excitedly together. Mr. Dursley was enraged to see that a couple of them weren't young at all; why, that man had to be older than he was, and wearing an emerald-green cloak! The nerve of him!**

"Just because it´s the Slytherin color...", whispered Regulus to Severus.

"I think not."

**But then it struck Mr. Dursley that this was probably some silly stunt - these people were obviously collecting for something... yes, that would be it. The traffic moved on and a few minutes later, Mr. Dursley arrived in the Grunnings parking lot, his mind back on drills.**

"One track mind. Drills aren´t that exciting", said Sirius

"What are these drills?", asked Collin Regulus

"How do you know that?",asked Regulus

"All Marauders are taking Muggle studies. And you know that, except Peter, we all are in the top five with Lily and that Ravenclaw"

"What is muggle studies? How can you not know what drills are?", asked Tony the wizards what refused to answer.

**Mr. Dursley always sat with his back to the window in his office on the ninth floor. If he hadn't, he might have found it harder to concentrate on drills that morning. He didn't see the owls swooping past in broad daylight, though people down in the street did; they pointed and gazed open- mouthed as owl after owl sped overhead. Most of them had never seen an owl even at night-time. Mr. Dursley, however, had a perfectly normal, owl-free morning. He yelled at five different people. He made several important telephone calls and shouted a bit more**

„Productive"

**He was in a very good mood until lunchtime,**

„That´s his good mood?", asked Tonks

"Yeah, you don´t wanna see him in a bad mood"

**when he thought**

„He can think?", Tony wanted to know

**he´d stretch his legs**

„WHAT?", added Clint

**and walk**

„He does exercise? I´m seriously worried now", continued Darcy

**across the road**

„Okay, the apocalypse started! Save yourself!", shouted Fred

**to buy himself a bun from the bakery**

„That explains it...Wait...Just one?", Remus asked

**He'd forgotten all about the people in cloaks until he passed a group of them next to the baker's. He eyed them angrily as he passed. He didn't know why, but they made him uneasy. This bunch were whispering excitedly, too, and he couldn't see a single collecting tin. It was on his way back past them, clutching a large doughnut in a bag,**

"Okay,it was a large dough...I thought he wanted a bun", James II asked, looking to Harry.

**that he caught a few words of what they were saying. "The Potters, that's right, that's what I heard yes, their son, Harry" Mr. Dursley stopped dead.**

"Why not literally?", asked James I to the ceiling.

**Fear flooded him. He looked back at the whisperers as if he wanted to say something to them, but thought better of it. He dashed back across the road, hurried up to his office, snapped at his secretary not to disturb him, seized his telephone, and had almost finished dialing his home number when he changed his mind. He put the receiver back down and stroked his mustache, thinking...**

**No, he was being stupid.**

"Acceptance is he first step to be good again", Albus said wisely.

"Shame it didn´t work. It think he was to stupid to remember this", said Teddy to the eight-year -old.

**Potter wasn't such an unusual name.**

"It is!", screamed James  
"In the muggle world it´s rather common. As is Black", answered Harry

"Really?", asked Sirius hopefully

"Yep", answered Lily  
"What is a muggle?", asked Jubel

**He was sure there were lots of people called Potter who had a son called Harry. Come to think of it, he wasn't even sure his nephew was called Harry. He'd never even seen the boy. It might have been Harvey. Or Harold.**

"As if. I´d like not to be killed by Sirius"

**There was no point in worrying Mrs. Dursley; she always got so upset at any mention of her sister.**

"Again, love you too."

**He didn't blame her - if he'd had a sister like that...**

"Your sister has a mustache."

**But all the same, those people in cloaks... He found it a lot harder to concentrate on drills that afternoon and when he left the building at five o'clock, he was still so worried that he walked straight into someone just outside the door. "Sorry," he grunted,**

"He knows that word? Hermonie said, she never heard her grandpa saying that", Albus told the others.

Fred was the most confused. Hermonie?"

"Dudleys second child. His children are Harry Dudley,Hermonie Alicia, Ronald Fred and Ginerva Marlene"

"WHAT?! That...? He...? Why?"

"Fifth till seventh book."

**As the tiny old man stumbled and almost fell. It was a few seconds before Mr. Dursley realized that the man was wearing a violet cloak. He didn't seem at all upset at being almost knocked to the ground. On the contrary, his face split into a wide smile and he said in a squeaky voice that made passers-by stare, "Don't be sorry, my dear sir, for nothing could upset me today! Rejoice, for You-Know-Who has gone at last!**

"HE`S GONE?!", screamed the past, sans Fred who answered: "For that time, yes."  
"HOW?"  
"Who is that You-know-Who- bloke?", asked Pepper.

**Even Muggles like yourself should be celebrating, this happy, happy day!" And the old man hugged Mr. Dursley around the middle. And walked off. Mr. Dursley stood rooted to the spot. He had been hugged by a complete stranger. He also thought he had been called a Muggle, whatever that was. He was rattled. He hurried to his car and set off for home, hoping he was imagining things, which he had never hoped before, because he didn't approve of imagination.**

"Can I kill him?", Clint asked Fury

**As he pulled into the driveway of number four, the first thing he saw - and it didn't improve his mood - was the tabby cat he'd spotted that morning. It was now sitting on his garden wall. He was sure it was the same one; it had the same markings around its eyes. "Shoo!" said Mr. Dursley loudly. The cat didn't move. It just gave him a stern look.**

**Was this normal cat behavior? Mr. Dursley wondered.**

**Trying to pull himself together, he let himself into the house. He was still determined not to mention anything to his wife. Mrs. Dursley had had a nice, normal day. She told him over dinner all about Mrs. Next Door's problems with her daughter and how Dudley had learned a new word ("Won't!").**

"Such an accomplishment."

**Mr. Dursley tried to act normally. When Dudley had been put to bed, he went into the living room in time to catch the last report on the evening news: "And finally, bird-watchers everywhere have reported that the nation's owls have been behaving very unusually today. Although owls normally hunt at night and are hardly ever seen in daylight, there have been hundreds of sightings of these birds flying in every direction since sunrise. Experts are unable to explain why the owls have suddenly changed their sleeping pattern." The newscaster allowed himself a grin. "Most mysterious. And now, over to Jim McGuffin with the weather. Going to be any more showers of owls tonight, Jim?" "Well, Ted,"**

"Was that grandma Andy´s husband?", asked Teddy.

"My Dad died too?", asked Tonks.

**said the weatherman, "I don't know about that, but it's not only the owls that have been acting oddly today. Viewers as far apart as Kent, Yorkshire, and Dundee have been phoning in to tell me that instead of the rain I promised yesterday, they've had a downpour of shooting stars! Perhaps people have been celebrating Bonfire Night early - it's not until next week, folks! But I can promise a wet night tonight." Mr. Dursley sat frozen in his armchair. Shooting stars all over Britain? Owls flying by daylight? Mysterious people in cloaks all over the place? And a whisper, a whisper about the Potters...Mrs. Dursley came into the living room carrying two cups of tea. It was no good. He'd have to say something to her. He cleared his throat nervously.**

"Be brave for once, make Harry proud",screamed James II, "I mean your grandson"

**"Er - Petunia, dear - you haven't heard from your sister lately, have you?" As he had expected, Mrs. Dursley looked shocked and angry. After all, they normally pretended she didn't have a sister. "No," she said sharply. "Why?" "Funny stuff on the news," Mr. Dursley mumbled. "Owls... shooting stars... and there were a lot of funny-looking people in town today..."**

**"So?" snapped Mrs. Dursley. "Well, I just thought... maybe... it was something to do with... you know... her crowd." Mrs. Dursley sipped her tea through pursed lips. Mr. Dursley wondered whether he dared tell her he'd heard the name "Potter." He decided he didn't dare.**

"Coward", said Darcy

**Instead he said, as casually as he could, "Their son - he'd be about Dudley's age now, wouldn't he?" "I suppose so," said Mrs. Dursley stiffly. "What's his name again? Howard, isn't it?" "Harry. Nasty, common name, if you ask me." "Oh, yes," said Mr. Dursley, his heart sinking horribly. "Yes, I quite agree." He didn't say another word on the subject as they went upstairs to bed. While Mrs. Dursley was in the bathroom, Mr. Dursley crept to the bedroom window and peered down into the front garden. The cat was still there. It was staring down Privet Drive as though it were waiting for something. Was he imagining things? Could all this have anything to do with the Potters? If it did... if it got out that they were related to a pair of - well, he didn't think he could bear it.**

"If it woudn´t be so bad for us, I´d make sure everyone knew of that", chorused all Potter pranksters

**The Dursleys got into bed. Mrs. Dursley fell asleep quickly but Mr. Dursley lay awake, turning it all over in his mind. His last, comforting thought before he fell asleep was that even if the Potters were involved, there was no reason for them to come near him and Mrs. Dursley.**

**The Potters knew very well what he and Petunia thought about them and their kind...**

"Why would I go near you?"

**He couldn't see how he and Petunia could get mixed up in anything that might be going on - he yawned and turned over - it couldn't affect them... How very wrong he was.**

"That one time he could have been right...", murmeld Harry

**Mr. Dursley might have been drifting into an uneasy sleep, but the cat on the wall outside was showing no sign of sleepiness. It was sitting as still as a statue, its eyes fixed unblinkingly on the far corner of Privet Drive. It didn't so much as quiver when a car door slammed on the next street, nor when two owls swooped overhead. In fact, it was nearly midnight before the cat moved at all.**

**A man appeared on the corner the cat had been watching, appeared so suddenly and silently you'd have thought he'd just popped out of the ground.**

"HOW?!", screamed all non-magical, except the spies. But Clint is included.

**The cat's tail twitched and its eyes narrowed. Nothing like this man had ever been seen on Privet Drive. He was tall, thin, and very old, judging by the silver of his hair and beard, which were both long enough to tuck into his belt. He was wearing long robes, a purple cloak that swept the ground, and high-heeled, buckled boots. His blue eyes were light, bright, and sparkling behind half-moon spectacles and his nose was very long and crooked, as though it had been broken at least twice. This man's name was Albus Dumbledore.**

"Awesome fashion sense has this Dumbledore"

"That´s our headmaster", chorused the past Gryffindors, while Albus said the same just with nameshake.

**Albus Dumbledore didn't seem to realize that he had just arrived in a street where everything from his name to his boots was unwelcome. He was busy rummaging in his cloak, looking for something. But he did seem to realize he was being watched, because he looked up suddenly at the cat, which was still staring at him from the other end of the street. For some reason, the sight of the cat seemed to amuse him. He chuckled and muttered, "I should have known." He found what he was looking for in his inside pocket. It seemed to be a silver cigarette lighter. He flicked it open, held it up in the air, and clicked it. The nearest street lamp went out with a little pop.**

"Where can I get this?", asked Fred.

"Ask Ron when he comes, if you can borrow it. That thing is unique, by the way"

**He clicked it again - the next lamp flickered into darkness. Twelve times he clicked the Put-Outer,**

"Deluminator"

**until the only lights left on the whole street were two tiny pinpricks in the distance, which were the eyes of the cat watching him. If anyone looked out of their window now, even beady-eyed Mrs. Dursley, they wouldn't be able to see anything that was happening down on the pavement. Dumbledore slipped the Put-Outer back inside his cloak and set off down the street toward number four, where he sat down on the wall next to the cat. He didn't look at it, but after a moment he spoke to it. "Fancy seeing you here, Professor McGonagall."**

"Let´s be quiet. I want to get over that quickly", said Harry

**He turned to smile at the tabby, but it had gone. Instead he was smiling at a rather severe-looking woman who was wearing square glasses exactly the shape of the markings the cat had had around its eyes. She, too, was wearing a cloak, an emerald one. Her black hair was drawn into a tight bun. She looked distinctly ruffled. "How did you know it was me?" she asked. "My dear Professor, I've never seen a cat sit so stiffly." "You'd be stiff if you'd been sitting on a brick wall all day," said Professor McGonagall.**

**"All day? When you could have been celebrating? I must have passed a dozen feasts and parties on my way here." Professor McGonagall sniffed angrily. "Oh yes, everyone's celebrating, all right," she said impatiently. "You'd think they'd be a bit more careful, but no - even the Muggles have noticed something's going on. It was on their news." She jerked her head back at the Dursleys' dark living-room window. "I heard it. Flocks of owls... shooting stars... Well, they're not completely stupid.**

**They were bound to notice something. Shooting stars down in Kent - I'll bet that was Dedalus Diggle. He never had much sense." "You can't blame them," said Dumbledore gently. "We've had precious little to celebrate for eleven years." "I know that," said Professor McGonagall irritably. "But that's no reason to lose our heads. People are being downright careless, out on the streets in broad daylight, not even dressed in Muggle clothes, swapping rumours." She threw a sharp, sideways glance at Dumbledore here, as though hoping he was going to tell her something, but he didn't, so she went on. "A fine thing it would be if, on the very day You-Know-Who seems to have disappeared at last, the Muggles found out about us all. I suppose he really has gone, Dumbledore?" "It certainly seems so," said Dumbledore. "We have much to be thankful for. Would you care for a lemon drop?" "A what?" "A lemon drop. They're a kind of Muggle sweet I'm rather fond of" "No, thank you," said Professor McGonagall coldly, as though she didn't think this was the moment for lemon drops.**

**"As I say, even if You-Know-Who has gone -" "My dear Professor, surely a sensible person like yourself can call him by his name? All this 'You- Know-Who' nonsense - for eleven years I have been trying to persuade people to call him by his proper name: Voldemort."**

**Professor McGonagall flinched, but Dumbledore, who was unsticking two lemon drops, seemed not to notice. "It all gets so confusing if we keep saying 'You Know-Who.' I have never seen any reason to be frightened of saying Voldemort's name. "I know you haven't, said Professor McGonagall, sounding half exasperated, half admiring. "But you're different. Everyone knows you're the only one You-Know- oh, all right, Voldemort, was frightened of." "You flatter me," said Dumbledore calmly. "Voldemort had powers I will never have." "Only because you're too - well - noble to use them." "It's lucky it's dark. I haven't blushed so much since Madam Pomfrey told me she liked my new earmuffs."**

**Professor McGonagall shot a sharp look at Dumbledore and said, "The owls are nothing next to the rumors that are flying around. You know what everyone's saying? About why he's disappeared? About what finally stopped him?"**

**It seemed that Professor McGonagall had reached the point she was most anxious to discuss, the real reason she had been waiting on a cold, hard wall all day, for neither as a cat nor as a woman had she fixed Dumbledore with such a piercing stare as she did now. It was plain that whatever "everyone" was saying, she was not going to believe it until Dumbledore told her it was true. Dumbledore, however, was choosing another lemon drop and did not answer. "What they're saying," she pressed on, "is that last night Voldemort turned up in Godric's Hollow. He went to find the Potters. The rumor is**

"Oh. I´m sorry."

"What happened that Tony Stark is sorry?", asked Pepper playfully.

**that Lily and James Potter are - are - that they're – dead."**

All good mood was gone.

Lily sobbed in James shoulder: "We´re going to die when we´re 21"  
The Marauders, Severus,...all the others of their time refused to believe it.

Everyone else put their heads down.

**Dumbledore bowed his head. Professor McGonagall gasped. "Lily and James... I can't believe it... I didn't want to believe it... Oh, Albus..." Dumbledore reached out and patted her on the shoulder. "I know... I know..." he said heavily. Professor McGonagall's voice trembled as she went on. "That's not all. They're saying he tried to kill the Potter's son, Harry.**

"NO!"

"Right here, Mum!"

**But – he couldn't. He couldn't kill that little boy. No one knows why, or how, but they're saying that when he couldn't kill Harry Potter, Voldemort's power somehow broke - and that's why he's gone.**

Fury´s cellphone beeped.

"Hill, Coulson, we have to go."

The three of them went out and James I asked: "You got rid of Voldyshnort, son. Merlin, that feels ankward..."

"Yes, Dad did! Twice!", shouted James II.

**Dumbledore nodded glumly. "It's - it's true?" faltered Professor McGonagall. "After all he's done... all the people he's killed... he couldn't kill a little boy? It's just astounding... of all the things to stop him... but how in the name of heaven did Harry survive?" "We can only guess," said Dumbledore. "We may never know."**

"He knew. Daddy says Dumbledore knew almost everything", said Lily II.

"That´s right, honey."

**Professor McGonagall pulled out a lace handkerchief and dabbed at her eyes beneath her spectacles. Dumbledore gave a great sniff as he took a golden watch from his pocket and examined it. It was a very odd watch. It had twelve hands but no numbers; instead, little planets were moving around the edge. It must have made sense to Dumbledore, though, because he put it back in his pocket and said, "Hagrid's late. I suppose it was he who told you I'd be here, by the way?" "Yes," said Professor McGonagall. "And I don't suppose you're going to tell me why you're here, of all places?" "I've come to bring Harry to his aunt and uncle. They're the only family he has left now."**

"WHY?! Why not Remus, Sirus, Peter, Dorcas, Marlene, Alice, hell I´d even prefer Severus and Regulus to them!"

"In that order? Wasn´t allowed, was innocent in Azkaban, should have been there, dead, dead, tortured to insanity, don´t actually know, dead."

"Thanks for make me feel even more sad and angry"

**"You don't mean - you can't mean the people who live here?" cried Professor McGonagall, jumping to her feet and pointing at number four. "Dumbledore - you can't. I've been watching them all day. You couldn't find two people who are less like us. And they've got this son - I saw him kicking his mother all the way up the street, screaming for sweets.**

"I would hate him, but he´s very nice now", said Albus

**Harry Potter come and live here!" "It's the best place for him," said Dumbledore firmly. "His aunt and uncle will be able to explain everything to him when he's older. I've written them a letter."**

"Tell me he´s kidding", pleaded Lily, "They´ll just inore it."

"I´d lie"

**"A letter?" repeated Professor McGonagall faintly, sitting back down on the wall. "Really, Dumbledore, you think you can explain all this in a letter? These people will never understand him! He'll be famous**

"You´re famous?"

"Yep"

**a legend**

"Check"

**I wouldn't be surprised if today was known as Harry Potter day in the future **

"Nope, still Halloween. Just like 2nd May and 31st July aren´t."

**there will be books written about Harry - every child in our world will know his name!"**

"Was a role model at age one, check"

**"Exactly," said Dumbledore, looking very seriously over the top of his half-moon glasses. "It would be enough to turn any boy's head. Famous before he can walk and talk! Famous for something he won't even remember! Can you see how much better off he'll be, growing up away from all that until he's ready to take it?"**

"I would have hated it anyways. I´m sure."

"Being famous can be a big burden", said Tony, surprising those who knew him."

**Professor McGonagall opened her mouth, changed her mind, swallowed, and then said, "Yes - yes, you're right, of course. But how is the boy getting here, Dumbledore?" She eyed his cloak suddenly as though she thought he might be hiding Harry underneath it. "Hagrid's bringing him." "You think it - wise - to trust Hagrid with something as important as this?" I would trust Hagrid with my life," said Dumbledore.**

"Me too, just not with my secrets", added all Gryffindors and Tonks.

**"I'm not saying his heart isn't in the right place," said Professor McGonagall grudgingly, "but you can't pretend he's not careless. He does tend to - what was that?" A low rumbling sound had broken the silence around them. It grew steadily louder as they looked up and down the street for some sign of a headlight; it swelled to a roar as they both looked up at the sky – and a huge motorcycle fell out of the air and landed on the road in front of them. If the motorcycle was huge, it was nothing to the man sitting astride it.**

"COOL!", exclaimed Sirius, "I need one!"

**He was almost twice as tall as a normal man and at least five times as wide. He looked simply too big to be allowed, and so wild – long tangles of bushy black hair and beard hid most of his face, he had hands the size of trash can lids, and his feet in their leather boots were like baby dolphins. In his vast, muscular arms he was holding a bundle of blankets.**

"He sounds scary", said Lily II, hiding hin her Daddy´s arms.

"Lilyflower, you know, it´s just Hagrid."

"Really?", she aske, looking in Harry´s face

"Yes, Aunt Hermonie just likes describing that way."

"Then Aunt Monie made me feel scared."

**"Hagrid," said Dumbledore, sounding relieved. "At last. And where did you get that motorcycle?" "Borrowed it, Professor Dumbledore, sit," said the giant, climbing carefully off the motorcycle as he spoke. "Young Sirius Black lent it to me.**

"It´s mine? WHOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOO!"

**I've got him, sir." "No problems, were there?" "No, sir - house was almost destroyed, but I got him out all right before the Muggles started swarmin' around. He fell asleep as we was flyin' over Bristol."**

"AWWWWWW!", cooed every female, except Natasha

**Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall bent forward over the bundle of blankets. Inside, just visible, was a baby boy, fast asleep. Under a tuft of jet-black hair over his forehead they could see a curiously shaped cut, like a bolt of lightning. "Is that where -?" whispered Professor McGonagall. "Yes," said Dumbledore. "He'll have that scar forever." "Couldn't you do something about it, Dumbledore?" "Even if I could, I wouldn't. Scars can come in handy. **

"Yep, it was good for headaches", said Harry, everyone else was much to sad to say something.

**I have one myself above my left knee that is a perfect map of the London Underground. Well - give him here, Hagrid - we'd better get this over with." Dumbledore took Harry in his arms and turned toward the Dursleys' house. "Could I - could I say good-bye to him, sir?" asked Hagrid. He bent his great, shaggy head over Harry and gave him what must have been a very scratchy, whiskery kiss. Then, suddenly, Hagrid let out a howl like a wounded dog. "Shhh!" hissed Professor McGonagall, "you'll wake the Muggles!" "S-s-sorry," sobbed Hagrid, taking out a large, spotted handkerchief and burying his face in it. "But I c-c-can't stand it - Lily an' James dead - an' poor little Harry off ter live with Muggles -" "Yes, yes, it's all very sad, but get a grip on yourself, Hagrid, or we'll be found," Professor McGonagall whispered, patting Hagrid gingerly on the arm as Dumbledore stepped over the low garden wall and walked to the front door. He laid Harry gently on the doorstep, took a letter out of his cloak, tucked it inside Harry's blankets, and then came back to the other two. For a full minute the three of them stood and looked at the little bundle; Hagrid's shoulders shook, Professor McGonagall blinked furiously, and the twinkling light that usually shone from Dumbledore's eyes seemed to have gone out.**

**"Well," said Dumbledore finally, "that's that. We've no business staying here. We may as well go and join the celebrations." "Yeah," said Hagrid in a very muffled voice, "I'll be takin' Sirius his bike back.**

"I hope."

"I have it now. You can borrow it. All past people can sleep at my house, except Fred, you have to sleep at George´s."

**G'night, Professor McGonagall - Professor Dumbledore, sir." Wiping his streaming eyes on his jacket sleeve, Hagrid swung himself onto the motorcycle and kicked the engine into life; with a roar it rose into the air and off into the night. "I shall see you soon, I expect, Professor McGonagall," said Dumbledore, nodding to her. Professor McGonagall blew her nose in reply. Dumbledore turned and walked back down the street. On the corner he stopped and took out the silver Put-Outer. He clicked it once, and twelve balls of light sped back to their street lamps so that Privet Drive glowed suddenly orange and he could make out a tabby cat slinking around the corner at the other end of the street. He could just see the bundle of blankets on the step of number four. "Good luck, Harry," he murmured.**

"Wonder where that luck went o long. It only comes when I was with your mother, Teddy or you four", Harry said, ruffeling Collin through the hair.

**He turned on his heel and with a swish of his cloak, he was gone. A breeze ruffled the neat hedges of Privet Drive, which lay silent and tidy under the inky sky, the very last place you would expect astonishing things to happen. Harry Potter rolled over inside his blankets without waking up. One small hand closed on the letter beside him and he slept on, not knowing he was special, not knowing he was famous, not knowing he would be woken in a few hours' time by Mrs. Dursley's scream as she opened the front door to put out the milk bottles, nor that he would spend the next few weeks being prodded and pinched by his cousin Dudley...**

"Why was Uncle Dudley such a meanie?", asked Albus

"His only role model before he was fifteen was Vernon."

"Oh"

**He couldn't know that at this very moment, people meeting in secret all over the country were holding up their glasses and saying in hushed voices: "To Harry Potter - the boy who lived!"**

"At least one question has been answered", concluded Thor

* * *

**My longest chapter to date.**

**Disclaimer: I have not been on the moon, I don´t own the Avengers, Harry Potter, or anybody else, except Collin Regulus Potter**

**Please review.**

**~Marvelgeek42**


	3. The Vanishing Glass

**Hello!  
**

**88 Followers and 54 Favorites! Are you kidding me!? I mean, it´s awesome, but I can´t believe it!**

* * *

_"At least one question has been answered", concluded Thor._

* * *

"Wait a second", demanded Bruce, " I have two questions. First: What are these "Galleons" James and Sirius were betting about? Second: If it was your flying motorcycle, which I also want explained, why didn´t you stop him?"

Harry decided to explain, as probably nobody else knew the whole story: "Galleons are money, which will be explained later. Sirius future, or past, version went after the person whose fault it was that Voldemort came. More will come later. I promise."

"Okay, then lets go on", laughed James while handing Sirius one golden coin, "**Chapter Two The Vanishing Glass** sounds like mpgh -" James couldn´t continue, because his son clapped his and over James mouth.

"We are not telling this particular fact yet, understood?", asked Harry, causing the magical people and Loki to laugh and the rest to wonder. James nodded and read on

**Nearly ten years had passed**

"**That means, soon it´s time for -", exclaimed Sirius.**

Harry threatened: "Did you forget, what I just said?"

"Don´t make Dad angry", advised Albus the rest, "He is scary when he´s angry."

**since the Dursleys had woken up to find their nephew on the front step, but Privet Drive had hardly changed at all.**

"Boooooooring", sany Darcy to the amusement of the pranksters.

**The sun rose on the same tidy front gardens and lit up the brass number four on the Dursleys' front door; it crept into their living room, which was almost exactly the same as it had been on the night when Mr. Dursley had seen that fateful news report about the owls.**

"Fateful? Overreacting much?!", yelled Regulus. His brother clapped him one the shoulder.

"I always knew, you had it in you."

Lily wondered why nobody fought in that room. Normally, something arleady would have happened.

**Only the photographs on the mantelpiece really showed how much time had passed.**

"Logically", concluded Bruce.

**Ten years ago, there had been lots of pictures of what looked like a large pink beach ball wearing different coloured bonnets**

"Why would anyone make photos of a beachball?", demanded Jubel

Harry and the others who saw Dudley at this point of time grinned. "Wait for it"

—**but Dudley Dursley was no longer a baby,**

"That is unhealty!", screamed Lily I, "He´ll die!"

"Makes it feel better that he is a personaltrainer in this time?", asked Teddy

Fred had to make sure he heard correctly: "Excuse me? HE is a personaltrainer?"

"Yes, he is!", screamed an excited James II, "He always takes Harry and me to his gym and teached us! That is increibly awesome!"

**and now the photographs showed a large blond boy riding his first bicycle, on a carousel at the fair, playing a computer game with his father, being hugged and kissed by his mother.**

"What?", asked the past purebloods (and Lily, as computers weren´t that far yet) (Tedy and Harry´s kids learned it from Harry, Hermonie and Dudley)

"You´re all from the past? Then it is okay", said a sligthly confused Tony

**The room held no sign at all that another boy lived in the house, too.**

"They better ta-te-treat Daddy right", threated Lily II

**Yet Harry Potter was still there, asleep at the moment, but not for long. His Aunt Petunia was awake and it was her shrill voice that made the first noise of the day.**

"It sucks tobe woken up from this", infomed Lily the rest.

**"Up! Get up! Now!"**

**Harry woke with a start. His aunt rapped on the door again.**

"Gee, give him some time!", groaned Clint

**"Up!" she screeched. Harry heard her walking toward the kitchen and then the sound of the frying pan being put on the stove.**

"You have a good hearing, Daddy", complimated Collin.

Harry gulped. The Cupboard.

**He rolled onto his back and tried to remember the dream he had been having. It had been a good one. There had been a flying motorcycle in it.**

"You hear that? MY giant flying motorcycle!", roared Sirius, earning him a smack from Remus. "You know that I have sensitive ears."

**He had a funny feeling he'd had the same dream before.**

"BREAK! Here are Clamingg Draughts, believe me, all of you will need them.", Harry preapared the others.

Bruce, Remus, Sirius, James and Lily directly grapped a small bottle each.

**His aunt was back outside the door.**

**"Are you up yet?" she demanded.**

**"Nearly," said Harry.**

**"Well, get a move on, I want you to look after the bacon. And don't you dare let it burn, I want everything perfect on Duddy's birthday."**

**Harry groaned.**

"I would have too", Tonks tol everyone.

**"What did you say?" his aunt snapped through the door.**

"Nothing", was agressivly whispered by everyone except Bruce, who began to open his bottle.

**"Nothing, nothing…"**

**Dudley's birthday—how could he have forgotten? Harry got slowly out of bed and started looking for socks. He found a pair under his bed and, after pulling a spider off one of them, put them on. Harry was used to spiders, because the cupboard under the stairs was full of them, and...**

James stopped reading, turned to Lily and asked: "Will you visit me in Azkaban when I´m in there?"

"Why would you be in this hellhole?"

"For murdering your sister. Listen:"

**because the cupboard under the stairs was full of them and that was where he slept**

"James. I won´t need to visit you. I will be in your cell for turturing her and Vermin."

"I´ll join you", muttered all males and some, scratch that, most adults. The non-magicals just assumed, correctly, that it was a prison.

**When he was dressed he went down the hall into the kitchen. The table was almost hidden beneath all Dudley's birthday presents. It looked as though Dudley had gotten the new computer he wanted, not to mention the second television and the racing bike.**

"That much!", exclaimed Tony and James I, surprising everybody, because it was common knowledge they were spoiled.

"I never was spoiled", elaborated Tony, "Howard just made me gifts for publicity, let me know this from early age and it never was a toy or something."  
"I may be a bit spioled, but I had limits. I got one big present and four or five smaller ones. Not", he paused to read ahead, "Not bloody 37!"

**Exactly why Dudley wanted a racing bike was a mystery to Harry,**

"And to me", muttered everyone who didn´t know him.

**as Dudley was very fat and hated exercise—unless of course it involved punching somebody.**

"That better not mean Harry...!", was hearded through the whole room.

**Dudley's favourite punching bag was Harry,**

If anybody was outside, all they would hear was growling, like seven Remuses (Remi?) on full moon.

**but he couldn't often catch him. Harry didn't look it, but he was very fast.**

"At least there´s that"

**Perhaps it had something to do with living in a dark cupboard, but Harry had always been small and skinny for his age.**

"Sure it´s not your Dad´s genes", joked Sirius.

All Potters glared at him.

**He looked even smaller and skinnier than he really was because all he had to wear were old clothes of Dudley's, and Dudley was about four times bigger than he was. **

"Urgh"

"He is not like that now!", Collin defended his Uncle.

**Harry had a thin face, knobbly knees, black hair, and bright green eyes. He wore round glasses held together with a lot of Sellotape because of all the times Dudley had punched him on the nose. The only thing Harry liked about his own appearance was a very thin scar on his forehead that was shaped like a bolt of lightning.**

"But you don´t like it!", protested Lily II

"At that time I liked it."

"Okay."

**He had had it as long as he could remember, and the first question he could ever remember asking his Aunt Petunia was how he had gotten it.**

**"In the car crash when your parents died,"**

Even on the other end of the Helicarrier you could hear it. "HOW DARE SHE!"

**she had said. "And don't ask questions."**

"How could you learn?", asked all brainiacs (Remus, Tony, Jane, Betty, Albus, Lily, Lily Luna, Regulus)  
"That was the point, I shouldn´t"

**Don't ask questions—that was the first rule for a quiet life with the Dursleys.**

**Uncle Vernon entered the kitchen as Harry was turning over the bacon.**

**"Comb your hair!" he barked, by way of a morning greeting.**

**About once a week, Uncle Vernon looked over the top of his newspaper and shouted that Harry needed a haircut. Harry must have had more haircuts than the rest of the boys in his class put together, but it made no difference, his hair simply grew that way—all over the place.**

**Harry was frying eggs by the time Dudley arrived in the kitchen with his mother. Dudley looked a lot like Uncle Vernon. He had a large pink face, not much neck, small, watery blue eyes, and thick blond hair that lay smoothly on his thick, fat head. Aunt Petunia often said that Dudley looked like a baby angel—Harry often said that Dudley looked like a pig in a wig.**

**Harry put the plates of egg and bacon on the table, which was difficult as there wasn't much room. Dudley, meanwhile, was counting his presents. His face fell.**

**"Thirty six," he said, looking up at his mother and father. "That's two less than last year."**

"Is he Siriusly disappointed?", asked the pranksters.

**"Darling, you haven't counted Auntie Marge's present, see, its here under this big one from Mommy and Daddy."**

"Wasn´t that Uncle Dudley´s eleventh birthday?", asked Collin

"Yes"

"Why is she saying that like he was six?"

**"All right, thirty seven then," said Dudley, going red in the face. Harry, who could see a huge Dudley tantrum coming on, began wolfing down his bacon as fast as possible in case Dudley turned the table over.**

"That ha happened dozens of times..."

**Aunt Petunia obviously scented danger, too, because she said quickly, "And we'll buy you another two presents while we're out today. How's that, popkin? Two more presents. Is that all right?"**

"That is no way to handle that!"

**Dudley thought for a moment. It looked like hard work. Finally he said slowly, "So I'll have thirty … thirty…"**

**"Thirty nine, sweetums," said Aunt Petunia.**

**"Oh." Dudley sat down heavily and grabbed the nearest parcel. "All right then."**

**Uncle Vernon chuckled. "Little tyke**

"LITTLE!", screamed nearly the whole room.

"There´s nothing little at him!", yelled Darcy

"Yes there is", said Fred. At the curios looks he added, "His brain"

"He is actually quite smart, if he wants to be", Harry defended his cousin.

Most wondered why.

**wants his money's worth, just like his father. 'Atta boy, Dudley!" He ruffled Dudley's hair.**

**At that moment the telephone rang and Aunt Petunia went to answer it while Harry and Uncle Vernon watched Dudley unwrap the racing bike, a video camera, a remote control airplane, sixteen new computer games, and a VCR. He was ripping the paper off a gold wristwatch when Aunt Petunia came back from the telephone looking both angry and worried.**

**"Bad news, Vernon," she said. "Mrs. Figg's broken her leg. She can't take him." She jerked her head in Harry's direction.**

"MY DADDY HAS A NAME!", yelled Lily Luna, bursting out with accidential magic, making all chairs pink.

**Dudley's mouth fell open in horror, but Harry's heart gave a leap. Every year on Dudley's birthday, his parents took him and a friend out for the day, to adventure parks, hamburger restaurants, or the movies. Every year, Harry was left behind with Mrs. Figg, a mad old lady who lived two streets away. Harry hated it there. The whole house smelled of cabbage and Mrs. Figg made him look at photographs of all the cats she'd ever owned.**

"Poor Harry/Dad"

**"Now what?" said Aunt Petunia, looking furiously at Harry as though he'd planned this. Harry knew he ought to feel sorry that Mrs. Figg had broken her leg, but it wasn't easy when he reminded himself it would be a whole year before he had to look at Tibbles, Snowy, Mr. Paws, and Tufty again.**

**"We could phone Marge," Uncle Vernon suggested.**

"Not her!", yelled Teddy, James II, Albus, Lily II and Collin

**"Don't be silly, Vernon, she hates the boy."**

"Feeling is mutal"

"I sense a story..."

"Third Book"

**The Dursleys often spoke about Harry like this, as though he wasn't there—or rather, as though he was something very nasty that couldn't understand them, like a slug.**

**"What about what's her name, your friend—Yvonne?"**

"They are still friends!?"

**"On vacation in Majorca," snapped Aunt Petunia.**

**"You could just leave me here," Harry put in hopefully (he'd be able to watch what he wanted on television for a change and maybe even have a go on Dudley's computer).**

**Aunt Petunia looked as though she'd just swallowed a lemon.**

"Nothing out of ordinary there"

**"So no different to normal" muttered Lily.**

**"And come back and find the house in ruins?" she snarled.**

**"I won't blow up the house," said Harry, but they weren't listening.**

"I would have", muttered the pranksters

**"I suppose we could take him to the zoo," said Aunt Petunia slowly, "…and leave him in the car…"**

**"That car's new, he's not sitting in it alone…"**

"Of course, the car is far more important than your nephew!"

Bruce had only half of a bottle now, what would he do later?

**Dudley began to cry loudly. In fact, he wasn't really crying—it had been years since he'd really cried—but he knew that if he screwed up his face and wailed, his mother would give him anything he wanted.**

**"Dinky Duddydums, don't cry, Mummy won't let him spoil your special day!" she cried, flinging her arms around him.**

**"I… don't… want… him… t-t-to come!" Dudley yelled between huge, pretend sobs. "He always sp-spoils everything!" He shot Harry a nasty grin through the gap in his mother's arms.**

"Honestly, I want to kill him", pleaded Clint, "Or at least his father?"

**Just then, the doorbell rang—"Oh, good Lord, they're here!" said Aunt Petunia frantically—and a moment later, Dudley's best friend, Piers Polkiss, walked in with his mother. Piers was a scrawny boy with a face like a rat.**

"Like Peter! Why isn´t he here?", whispered Sirius to the other Marauders

"Dunno, but Harry said something about he should have been in prison", answered James

**He was usually the one who held people's arms behind their backs while Dudley hit them. Dudley stopped pretending to cry at once.**

**Half an hour later, Harry, who couldn't believe his luck, was sitting in the back of the Dursleys' car with Piers and Dudley, on the way to the zoo for the first time in his life. His aunt and uncle hadn't been able to think of anything else to do with him, but before they'd left, Uncle Vernon had taken Harry aside.**

"Just leave him alone, you annoying muggle!", exclaimed Regulus.

Everyone else stare at him either angry or confused.

Severus helped his friend: "You realize we are here with...ten muggles, two gods and thirteen people who extremely dislike Death Eaters, including their opinions?"

**"I'm warning you," he had said, putting his large purple face right up close to Harry's, "I'm warning you now, boy—any funny business, anything at all—and you'll be in that cupboard from now until Christmas."**

**"I'm not going to do anything," said Harry, "honestly…"**

**But Uncle Vernon didn't believe him. No one ever did.**

"As proven in the year of the toad", chorused Fred and George, who had arrived just in time to hear the last sentence.

"Everyone, that is Fred´s twin George"

"Uncle George!", yelled Harry´s kids before storming at him.

"Did you bring something form WWW?"

"No, Roxanne and Fred will."

Clint asked: "I thought he was here already?"

"His child", concluded Bruce.

"Again, I won´t ask..."

**The problem was, strange things often happened around Harry and it was just no good telling the Dursleys he didn't make them happen.**

"But you did, Daddy!?" Lily looked at his face.

"I didn´t know that than."

"Did you know anything?", asked James II, not liking how dumb his father sounded.

**Once, Aunt Petunia, tired of Harry coming back from the barbers looking as though he hadn't been at all, had taken a pair of kitchen scissors and cut his hair so short he was almost bald except for his bangs, which she left "to hide that horrible scar." Dudley had laughed himself silly at Harry, who spent a sleepless night imagining school the next day, where he was already laughed at for his baggy clothes and taped glasses. Next morning, however, he had gotten up to find his hair exactly as it had been before Aunt Petunia had sheared it off. He had been given a week in his cupboard for this, even though he had tried to explain that he couldn't explain how it had grown back so quickly.**

**Another time, Aunt Petunia had been trying to force him into a revolting old sweater of Dudley's (brown with orange puff balls)—The harder she tried to pull it over his head, the smaller it seemed to become, until finally it might have fitted a hand puppet, but certainly wouldn't fit Harry. Aunt Petunia had decided it must have shrunk in the wash and, to his great relief, Harry wasn't punished.**

"FINALLY!"

Remus made a mental note to search a way he would not get deaf in a break.

**On the other hand, he'd gotten into terrible trouble for being found on the roof of the school kitchens. Dudley's gang had been chasing him as usual when, as much to Harry's surprise as anyone else's, there he was sitting on the chimney. The Dursleys had received a very angry letter from Harry's headmistress telling them Harry had been climbing school buildings. But all he'd tried to do (as he shouted at Uncle Vernon through the locked door of his cupboard) was jump behind the big trash cans outside the kitchen doors. Harry supposed that the wind must have caught him in mid-jump.**

"Did you...?"  
"No idea"

**But today, nothing was going to go wrong. It was even worth being with Dudley and Piers to be spending the day somewhere that wasn't school, his cupboard, or Mrs. Figg's cabbage smelling living room.**

**While he drove, Uncle Vernon complained to Aunt Petunia. He liked to complain about things: people at work, Harry, the council, Harry, the bank, and Harry were just a few of his favourite subjects.**

"There was no need to say Harry thrice, we got you the first time, Vermin"

**This morning, it was motorcycles.**

"YOU DON´T DARE!"

"SIRIUS! I. Have. Sensitive. Ears!"

**"…roaring along like maniacs, the young hoodlums," he said, as a motorcycle overtook them.**

**"I had a dream about a motorcycle," said Harry, remembering suddenly. "It was flying."**

**Uncle Vernon nearly crashed into the car in front. He turned right around in his seat and yelled at Harry, his face like a gigantic beet with a moustache: "MOTORCYCLES DON'T FLY!"**

"Mine does"

**Dudley and Piers sniggered.**

**"I know they don't," said Harry. "It was only a dream."**

**But he wished he hadn't said anything. If there was one thing the Dursleys hated even more than his asking questions, it was his talking about anything acting in a way it shouldn't, no matter if it was in a dream or even a cartoon—they seemed to think he might get dangerous ideas.**

"He needs "  
"no help"  
"for that"

Merlin, George was so happy to be able to that again.

**It was a very sunny Saturday and the zoo was crowded with families. The Dursleys bought Dudley and Piers large chocolate ice creams at the entrance and then, because the smiling lady in the van had asked Harry what he wanted before they could hurry him away,**

"Go Lady in the van!", cheered the pranksters.

**they bought him a cheap lemon ice pop. It wasn't bad, either, Harry thought, licking it as they watched a gorilla scratching its head who looked remarkably like Dudley, except that it wasn't blond.**

"DADDY! Do not be mean to that poor gorilla!"

"She´s right, son, what has he ever done to you?"

"I apologized"

**Harry had the best morning he'd had in a long time. He was careful to walk a little way apart from the Dursleys so that Dudley and Piers, who were starting to get bored with the animals by lunchtime, wouldn't fall back on their favourite hobby of hitting him.**

The wolves were there again. **(A/N What would Remus think of this sentence?)**

**They ate in the zoo restaurant, and when Dudley had a tantrum because his knickerbocker glory didn't have enough ice cream on top, Uncle Vernon bought him another one and Harry was allowed to finish the first.**

"Is he real?"

"That is Dudley Vernon Dursley age eleven. What do you think, Mom?"

**Harry felt, afterward, that he should have known it was all too good to last.**

"Pessimist"

"Live my life, than judge afterwards"

**After lunch they went to the reptile house. It was cool and dark in there, with lit windows all along the walls. Behind the glass, all sorts of lizards and snakes were crawling and slithering over bits of wood and stone. Dudley and Piers wanted to see huge, poisonous cobras and thick, man crushing pythons. Dudley quickly found the largest snake in the place. It could have wrapped its body twice around Uncle Vernon's car and crushed it into a trash can—but at the moment it didn't look in the mood. In fact, it was fast asleep.**

**Dudley stood with his nose pressed against the glass, staring at the glistening brown coils.**

**"Make it move," he whined at his father.**

"He can´t", muttered Regulus

**Uncle Vernon tapped on the glass, but the snake didn't budge.**

**"Do it again," Dudley ordered.**

"He still can´t", repeated Severus.

**Uncle Vernon rapped the glass smartly with his knuckles, but the snake just snoozed on.**

**"This is boring," Dudley moaned. He shuffled away.**

**Harry moved in front of the tank and looked intently at the snake. He wouldn't have been surprised if it had died of boredom itself—no company except stupid people drumming their fingers on the glass trying to disturb it all day long. It was worse than having a cupboard as a bedroom, where the only visitor was Aunt Petunia hammering on the door to wake you up; at least he got to visit the rest of the house.**

"Are you comparing yourself with a snake?"

**The snake suddenly opened its beady eyes. Slowly, very slowly, it raised its head until its eyes were on a level with Harry's.**

**It winked.**

"You´re a parselmouth?", James I asked.

"Yeah, as well as your grandkids", answered Harry.

"Hey, I just wondered how! It´s awesome!", screamed James I in fear of having hurt his son.  
"And we´d be real hypocrites", added Sirius, "Thinking of Remus or my family, sans Reg."

"Okay, what is a parselmouth?", asked Tony

"What´s so bad about it?", continued Bruce

"What is with Remus?", added Natasha  
"And your family?", finished Jane

**Harry stared. Then he looked quickly around to see if anyone was watching. They weren't. He looked back at the snake and winked, too.**

**The snake jerked its head toward Uncle Vernon and Dudley, then raised its eyes to the ceiling. It gave Harry a look that said quite plainly:**

**"I get that all the time."**

**"I know," Harry murmured through the glass, though he wasn't sure the snake could hear him. "It must be really annoying."**

**The snake nodded vigorously.**

**"Where do you come from, anyway?" Harry asked.**

**The snake jabbed its tail at a little sign next to the glass. Harry peered at it.**

**Boa Constrictor, Brazil.**

**"Was it nice there?"**

"Not weird at all..."

**The boa constrictor jabbed its tail at the sign again and Harry read on: This specimen was bred in the zoo. "Oh, I see—so you've never been to Brazil?"**

**As the snake shook its head, a deafening shout behind Harry made both of them jump.**

**"DUDLEY! MR. DURSLEY! COME AND LOOK AT THIS SNAKE! YOU WON'T BELIEVE WHAT IT'S DOING!"**

**Dudley came waddling toward them as fast as he could.**

A few pranksters actually fell of their chairs

**"Out of the way, you," he said, punching Harry in the ribs. Caught by surprise, Harry fell hard on the concrete floor. What came next happened so fast no one saw how it happened—one second, Piers and Dudley were leaning right up close to the glass, the next, they had leapt back with howls of horror.**

"What happened?"

**Harry sat up and gasped; the glass front of the boa constrictor's tank had vanished. The great snake was uncoiling itself rapidly, slithering out onto the floor. People throughout the reptile house screamed and started running for the exits.**

**As the snake slid swiftly past him, Harry could have sworn a low, hissing voice said, "Brazil, here I come… Thanksss, amigo."**

"The snake can speak?", asked all non-magical brainiacs.

**The keeper of the reptile house was in shock.**

**"But the glass," he kept saying, "where did the glass go?"**

"In the non-being, which is saying into everything"

**The zoo director himself made Aunt Petunia a cup of strong, sweet tea while he apologized over and over again. Piers and Dudley could only gibber. As far as Harry had seen, the snake hadn't done anything except snap playfully at their heels as it passed, but by the time they were all back in Uncle Vernon's car, Dudley was telling them how it had nearly bitten off his leg, while Piers was swearing it had tried to squeeze him to death. But worst of all, for Harry at least, was Piers calming down enough to say, "Harry was talking to it, weren't you, Harry?"**

"Why you little..."

"Don´t swear in front of the kids"

**Uncle Vernon waited until Piers was safely out of the house before starting on Harry. He was so angry he could hardly speak. He managed to say, "Go—cupboard—stay—no meals," **

"THAT IS NO PUNISHMENT!"

**before he collapsed into a chair, and Aunt Petunia had to run and get him a large brandy.**

**Harry lay in his dark cupboard much later, wishing he had a watch. He didn't know what time it was and he couldn't be sure the Dursleys were asleep yet. Until they were, he couldn't risk sneaking to the kitchen for some food.**

"You shouldn´t have to do that", Lily sobbed

**He'd lived with the Dursleys almost ten years, ten miserable years, as long as he could remember, ever since he'd been a baby and his parents had died in that car crash. He couldn't remember being in the car when his parents had died.**

"There was no car", said Collin C.

"Really? I thought so, even after I was famous for 24 damn years!"

**Sometimes, when he strained his memory during long hours in his cupboard, he came up with a strange vision: a blinding flash of green light and a burning pain on his forehead.**

"The..."

Remus bottle was half empty now, James and Lily each had one, and Bruce one and a half.

**This, he supposed, was the crash, though he couldn't imagine where all the green light came from. He couldn't remember his parents at all.**

"Now I can, a bit..."

**His aunt and uncle never spoke about them, and of course he was forbidden to ask questions. There were no photographs of them in the house.**

"We have some at home", informed Collin the others quickly.

**When he had been younger, Harry had dreamed and dreamed of some unknown relation coming to take him away, but it had never happened; the Dursleys were his only family. Yet sometimes he thought (or maybe hoped) that strangers in the street seemed to know him.**

"Still do"

**Very strange strangers they were, too. A tiny man in a violet top hat had bowed to him once while out shopping with Aunt Petunia and Dudley. After asking Harry furiously if he knew the man, Aunt Petunia had rushed them out of the shop without buying anything. A wild looking old woman dressed all in green had waved merrily at him once on a bus. A bald man in a very long purple coat had actually shaken his hand in the street the other day and then walked away without a word. The weirdest thing about all these people was the way they seemed to vanish the second Harry tried to get a closer look.**

**At school, Harry had no one. Everybody knew that Dudley's gang hated that odd Harry Potter in his baggy old clothes and broken glasses, and nobody liked to disagree with Dudley's gang.**

"Who even has a gang at eleven?"

"Uncle Dudley"

* * *

**Disclaimer: If I own anything that makes money, George Washington is just singing "Same Love" from Makemore behind you.**

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**~Marvelgeek42**


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